I did it. Tonight, I joined a Codependents Anonymous Support Group, otherwise known as Coda. I am codependent to a larger degree than I had thought. I also don't know where all of this shame is coming from, but I'm happy that I've taken the initiative. I've known that I was codependent on an intellectual … Continue reading Step 1: We Admitted That Our Lives Had Become Unmanagable
My house looks emptier as the days roll on. No kidding, I've gotten rid of almost everything except my tapestries, and my desk (which I plan on trading in for a smaller one). Of course, I still use my laptop to write to you on here. If you've been following me since I vowed to … Continue reading 10:43 P.M.
the first time she smiled at me/it felt like her smile was forbidden/She buried her face in my pillow and she laughed as she bared her fangs/she never used them as a weapon with me/and I felt like I was one with the pack/Age wasn't a factor and we/ fell in love starting from my … Continue reading The first smile
There’s always been someone there when I felt like I wanted to end my life. Giving up is harder than pushing forward when there are these indigo children just like you, begging you to listen. So I do. I do not mean indigo children as in ancient aliens or the oval-shaped dudes on spaceships. I … Continue reading Indigo
new beginning nosedive
Time moves on, and I have held on Still, I will weep for the child That got lost in the abyss.I can feel the ache in meWhen I think back to all those homesThat I could not escapeI was too old at eighteen.I left with nothing.____________________________I am twenty-six now, and sometimes I forget my age.I forget that … Continue reading Sometimes I forget
Yesterday, I did not turn around.There was some comment About how I'm a blonde now, But, I'm not."It's bleach,"I let you pretendThat our house wasn't on fire."Do you like it?"You ask this in a way that reminds me you like to make my mouth your favorite fishing spot."It's whatever," I've learned a lot about lying from … Continue reading About Yesterday